At Humber, we recognize that we all have a responsibility in preventing and addressing sexual violence. Sexual violence is rooted in gender-based violence, and so men may feel that it is a "women's issue"; however, we acknowledge that men must also take action and hold one another accountable. The Survey on Individual Safety in the Postsecondary Student Population (Statistics Canada, 2019) found that men were less likely to view unwanted sexualized behaviours as harmful, twice as likely to think people are too offended by unwanted sexualized behaviours, and the perpetrators of unwanted sexualized behaviours are more often men.

The Men Seeking Change working group encourages men to reflect on behaviours that could cause harm to others and to intervene when they see these behaviours happening. We will be sharing examples of inappropriate behaviours and ways men could intervene in these behaviours over March and April as a reminder to take action and maintain our culture of respect.

Unhealthy Behaviour: Inappropriate discussion about sex life.

Example: Zac (he/him), Monique (she/her), Marshall (he/him), Tyler (they/them), Dan (they/them), and Jeff (he/him) are placed into a breakout room together during a class activity. After finishing the activity early, they start talking about Grey’s Anatomy; Zac mentions the on-call sex scenes and shares a similar sexual exploit from his own experience in detail. Marshall and Jeff join in with their own stories.

What could Marshall and Jeff have done differently?

Marshall and Jeff could have told Zac they don’t think it’s the time or place to be sharing such stories, and could switch the topic of conversation.

Example: John (he/him), Derek (he/him) and Helen (she/her) often work together on pitches. While working on a pitch, John tells Helen about his latest one-night stand and asks Helen who she is “smashing at night.” Derek laughs and continues working.

What could Derek have done differently?

Derek could have let John know that this discussion is not appropriate for work and could make people uncomfortable. If John continues to discuss his sex life while they’re working on pitches, Derek could report up through their supervisor or Human Resources.