All month the 2SLGBTQ+ Employee Resource Group (ERG) will be putting out Communiqué posts with reminders, information, and history relevant to Pride.
As we celebrate the 2SLGBTQ+ community and all the progress we’ve made, many of us are asking: how can we continue to create braver, more empathetic, and more inclusive communities for people of all sexual and gender identities and expressions?
Let’s start off by unpacking one of the ways 2SLGBTQ+ exclusion can work its way into even the seemingly most inclusive of spaces- through the pervasiveness of heteronormativity.
Pop quiz! Can you spot the assumptions packed into the phrases above?
- “Good morning, ladies and gentlemen!”
- “What a handsome kid! I bet he’ll grow up to be quite the ladies’ man.”
- “I heard you got married! Will you be taking your husband’s surname?”
- “Menstrual products should be available to all women on campus for free.”
For some, it may take a bit of time to identify how and why these phrases are problematic. But for many of us 2SLGBTQ+ folks, hearing these phrases triggers an immediate sense of exclusion and erasure.
Heteronormativity is the assumption that heterosexuality is the normal, natural, preferred, default sexuality. It is also often associated with the unexamined assumption that cisgender identities, traditional gender roles, and gender binarism (the notion that there are two distinct and opposite genders) are universal. (source)
The assumption that everyone is straight and cisgender permeates our culture and our language. Heteronormativity harms queer and trans people because these assumptions erase our lived experiences. They can make us feel left out and convey the sense that we are abnormal or different. When people make assumptions about our gender and/or sexuality, it can make us feel as though we must either lie by omission or out ourselves. Neither option is conducive to a feeling of belonging.
Here are some easy tips and tricks to combat implicit heteronormativity that you can start practicing today:
1. Don’t assume a person’s gender or sexual orientation
When you are meeting someone for the first time, stereotypes can lead you to believe that you can tell someone’s sexual orientation or gender identity. But that’s not at all the case! For instance, someone’s gender expression may be quite different from their gender identity. Be mindful, polite and open-minded, and whenever possible, use gender-neutral terms until the person shares with you their gender identity and sexual orientation.
2. Use inclusive language
Swapping heteronormative language for inclusive language can be as simple as getting used to using the following words and phrases:
Acknowledge that there are a multitude of gender identities
Instead of: “Both women and men […]”
Say: “People of all genders […]”
Replace gendered terms with inclusive ones
Instead of: “Good morning, ladies/gentlemen/girls/guys!”
Say: “Good morning, friends/folks/everyone!”
Create space for all sexual identities
Instead of: “Do you have a boyfriend/husband?”
Say: “Do you have a partner/spouse?”
For more information, please view Humber College’s Inclusive Language Guide.
Stay tuned for more Pride Humber Communiqué posts throughout the month of June.